You want to find true love? Great! Everyone does. In order to do so, be strong and take a good look at yourself: your good and bad qualities, and see if you truly deserve it?!

Living in a time, which is already considered the “future”, we are surrounded by high-tech gadgets, and artificial intelligence, yet the one thing that still confuses mankind, is the concept of true love. The big problem is that people tend to blame society and others, but do they actually look deeper within themselves to figure out what their own flaws are? No wonder the aliens have not arrived yet, the silly humans can’t even deal with their own crap, let alone ET.

Do you have the guts to look at yourself and admit any of this: Do you always like to be right, and win an argument? Do you always want to be in control? Is your opinion always the right one, because you think you know better? Do you let your emotions control you, and create dramas or scenes? Do you make a big deal out of small things? Do you like to argue? Is it hard for you to compromise? Do you protect yourself too much? Do you think people want to hurt you? Do you feel that people don’t understand you? Do you have strong hurts from the past that you are still holding onto? Are you still attached to your ex long after the relationship is over? Do you lose your temper often? Do you get angry fast? Are you hard to get along with? Do you take people for granted? Do you get offended or hurt easily by what people say? Do you have a weak character? Are you too sensitive, or not sensitive enough? Are you greedy? Are you selfish and egoistic? Do you use people? Do you play with people’s feelings? Do you speak bad about and hurt others? Do you only take and not give back? Do you overanalyze situations too much? Are you a pessimist? Are you jealous? You must be extremely honest with yourself and see where your problem is, otherwise you will never be truly happy. I will be open to you dear readers and say that at least three of the above used to affect me. One day I decided to be brutally honest with myself, and stop this torture. My own foolish behavior was killing me. I decided to work on myself to become a better person, and give true love a chance to find me and enrich my life.

No one is born perfect, but you must improve yourself in order to deserve true love! Life is about learning and growing. I call it self-evolution. Be yourself without being afraid that your “true self” will scare your partner away. Open yourself to giving and receiving from others. Take care of yourself. Work on your self-esteem. When a man sees/feels that a woman respects and treats herself well, he will in return respect and treat her with kindness and care! When you are happy, he will be happy too!

Look back at all your relationships and figure out the pattern. Where have you been wrong? What could you have done better? Learn from your mistakes! Perhaps you have chosen the wrong partners? Do not date the same “types” anymore. Try meeting different people that you would not normally even pay attention to. Don’t concentrate too much on their appearance. Soften your body language and do not be too defensive, not everyone is out there to hurt you. Sorry girls, Superman is a myth. Your true love will not fly in through your bedroom window, so make an effort to go out and meet new people. Try the gym, bookstore, grocery store, café, bar, cooking school, oldtimer car event, art/music classes, galleries, museums, etc.

Open your heart to others and be surprised. I know this is one of the hardest things to do, especially if you have been hurt in the past! This takes a lot of strength and courage. Many people tend to become cynical and bitter after they have been hurt. However, only the strong can get up, dust themselves off and have the courage to open up to love again. Fact is: if you wont open up anymore, you will never have a chance to meet your true love. We have all been hurt, but would you rather be safe and stay alone, or take a chance and meet someone wonderful?

Surround yourself with positive people that are seeking out the goodness in life. We all have those friends that love to complain and gossip how awful men are, that they are all the same bastards and only want one thing from you. No, not all men are jerks that just want sex. Not all women are superficial and only run after the man’s wallets. Please try to stay away from such negative people and drama. These “friends” influence a thinking pattern that you are a victim to bad men/women that will only want to hurt you. Instead, surround yourself with happy, strong, positive and life-loving people, and they might even have a good friend to set you up with.

Desperation is the key to failure, hurt and pain. Even if you have been single for years, do not date someone that is bad to you, just for the sake of being in a relationship. Be honest with yourself how good s/he is for you? Better single and happy, than with a partner that makes you feel miserable!

Communicate your needs, thoughts and feelings. S/he is most likely not a psychic. If something is bothering you, say it. Even if you think it’s embarrassing, say it. Do not be afraid to loose him/her. If it’s true love, you will not lose them. You will only gain their respect by being able to talk about and sharing your thoughts, opinions and problems. The trick to finding true love is by first working on yourself and making sure that you truly deserve it! It’s always easy to point fingers at others, but look at yourself first! Believe me, I have gone through this myself, once you face the truth and work on your flaws to become a better person, true love will find you. Remember my words. Good luck!